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Motivation
Finally Emily didn’t cry for consecutive 2 days in the morning when I send her to school. Yesterday hubby and I encourage her, if she doesn’t cry, we will get her a small present. Today we will give her roti canai. It makes us think whether this a motivation or a bribe?
I read some where that we should not bribe our children. Do we consider rewarding for doing well a bribe or a motivator? I watched a TV program whereby the teacher was rewarding the under achiever students with a gift, even though they score 35 /100. The teacher was motivating them to do well. However the principal think otherwise, saying it is not good to attract student to do well, with reward. If no reward, they will slack. Next scene, they show a corporate meeting where the manager told everyone, if they successfully complete the project, they will receive 5 months bonus. Ha! What an irony? :duh:
What do I think? Bribing a child is wrong but rewarding for good behavior is alright. Example if the child is crying, telling the child not to cry if you give him a candy is bribing. Next time, he will cry double as loud because he knows he will get a candy for stopping. However if the child shows good behavior like keeping his toys, rewarding him for doing so is alright.
Reward doesn’t have to be material, praise, a kiss, a clap or taking them to special places like park or playground will be rewarding. However, never over do it because it is no good if the child is always waiting for a reward if he shows good behavior. What do you think?
Emily: Papa, I few.
Emily: Mummy I few.
Emily: Kor Kor I few.
Mummy, Papa, Kor Kor: :think: :eh: :sc:Mummy: Ahhh….I love you too, Emily. 😀
11 Responses to “Motivation”
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Sabrina said on August 23rd, 2006 at 4:57 pm
So cute. Keith will always miss the word “LOVE” He’ll only pronounce “I U”
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So complex huh? Child care..
Hmm.. I told Zara if she stopped thumb sucking I give her a present.. is that bribing or reward?Gee..
I few Michelle! 😀
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michelle said on August 23rd, 2006 at 8:43 pm
Sabrina: As long as you the mother get the meaning. 😀
Zara’s mama: Yeap, that’s is why we are given the maternal instinct. Rely on it. L few you and Zara too. 🙂
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Vien said on August 24th, 2006 at 4:40 am
I understand the concept of bribery and reward but my in-laws don’t! :wall: They always praise her..always say, “Oh our Ting Ting is sucha a good girl”, “Oh, our Ting Ting is so smart.” Aiyo..they just praise her eventhough she is just sitting there doing nothing. I have a feeling they will spoil her to death..and this girl of mine will manipulate them. You know how kids can be..they are experts in manipulating the grandparents. *sigh*
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Its a fine line between bribery and reward. :sc:
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jesslyn said on August 24th, 2006 at 9:41 am
MIL like to to bribe the girls, use sweet some more…sigh
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Jan said on August 24th, 2006 at 10:19 am
hmmmm……I tell my kids, don’t cry if you want mummy to bring you to school. If you cry, then Daddy will bring you…..what category doesn’t that go into? kekekeke
So far I have never really used sweets as form of reward but they do know that if they are well hehaved, they get to stay up slightly later to play their favourite toy.
I few…so cute!!!
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MagicTree said on August 24th, 2006 at 4:31 pm
A little bit of bribery is no problem for me! Yeah..Emily is so cute with her “I few”
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huisia said on August 24th, 2006 at 4:57 pm
Though i quite agree on what you mentioned, sometimes i just broken the rule to bribe my son whenever he cried and cranky that hard to make him stop.
I confused too..finally i know is “i love you”…hahaha
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michelle said on August 25th, 2006 at 9:24 am
Vien, Jess: Grandparents, they do have a different way of bringing up the children. After all they brought us all up to be a fine individual. 😀
Mumsgather: Hehehe..need a microscope?
MagicTree: Emily always surprise me.
Huisia: We all do, no one is perfect. 🙂
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maria @ twinsmom said on August 25th, 2006 at 10:27 am
ai…. my kids love your site, so many emoticons.
err… to me the different between reward and bribe is, reward come after result show, without prior giving, “OK, you already finished your rice, so clever, mommy give ice-cream.” prior promise maybe, like what you did.
But bribe is something gave or promise before the job done, and something more valueble, and something we all will go “WHAO…. SO UNEXPECTED, I cannot believe what I have just hear.” in our heart when we say it out.
sound “chim” hor? but I guess we all know how to tell lar.
Oh, I few too LOL….